10 More Reasons Minor Hockey is better than the NHL
1) In the NHL, the goalie’s go-to move is the butterfly. It’s effective, efficient and so very boring. In minor hockey the go-to move looks like they’re falling on a live grenade or driving off a high-board. It’s used on long shots, short shots, when a player is trying to deek them out, and even when they think no one is looking and they get bored. Squirrel!
2) I don’t know if I’ve ever seen so many bum saves in the NHL as you do in minor hockey. Sometimes it’s a variation of the downward dog, sometimes it’s just because they haven’t turned around fast enough. I think someone should keep track of the bum saves. It could be an interesting stat. “And little Bobby Johnson stopped 22 shots in the game, four with his ass, three with his face, five while looking the wrong way and ten by leaping on the puck like a cat on a mouse.”
3) When the puck is in the other end of the rink, the goalie will get bored and do something to entertain himself. Can you imagine Luongo (can I still use that name?) lying on his back, staring up at the ceiling? Or practicing butterflies? Or swinging his stick around like a Viking swings an axe? Or singing? Or going all gungun style?
4) When a team scores, watch the celebration moves. In the NHL, they have the moves down pat. In minor hockey, it’s, well, a work in progress. They are as odd as they are entertaining. I swear more injuries occur as they try to high five each other with their heads or ride a stick or spin around or pump their fists in the air.
5) I wonder if the Canucks sit in the dressing room and whack each other in the nuts over and over and over again to see if their jocks work. Would Kesler’s mom have to say, “Stop hitting your friend in the nuts with your stick!” You know what? Probably. And recently, too. However, with young boys, this seems to be the norm. All I can think of is God help the kid who forgets his one day.
6) In the NHL, you watch the play. You follow the puck. Maybe see how they do the changes. But sometimes watching the little guys (or girls) the fun is seeing how many will fall on a line change. Or how one really doesn’t want to play defence and so twitches on the blueline, waiting for his chance to charge in. Or the one who would really rather be at home and so skates around in circles, off in his own little world.
7) How often do you see the entire team has fallen down? In the NHL, not often. In minor hockey, not only could an entire team be down, but ¾ of them could be in the net.
8) How often does Crosby deek himself out? Maybe he can be a little too clever sometimes, but with the little ones, they are their own worst enemies sometimes. If someone was doing play-by-play, it might sound like this… “It’s a breakaway. 4-0. The goalie falls down. The net is wide open. All ‘X’ has to do is shoot… and ‘X’ steps on the puck.” Or “and he moves left, he moves right, he.. ooops he did one too many moves and fell down.” It’s why the results of a breakaway, (and there are a LOT) are massively unpredictable.
9) You’ll hear this at both games. “Don’t throw the puck in the front of your own net!!!!” However, in minor hockey, you’ll also could hear this immediately afterwards. “Mommy loves you!” Ok, maybe Kesler’s mom still says that.
10) In minor hockey, after a season, you see an amazing improvement in the player’s skills. In the NHL, it seems like the later in the year, the worse some teams play (*cough Canucks cough*) In minor hockey, it’s such a thrill to see how much better they skate, they pass, play their positions and gel as a team. You ask me, that’s worth every 6am practice.
And lastly, none of the little kids gets paid a dime for playing. They do it for love of the game, (sometimes the odd small trophy and a bag of skittles,) and they do it for… FUN. You can see the difference.